D Gray-Metal
by Captain Jap
Summary: Something causes the exorcists' Innocence to freeze their owners and their enemies in a comatose state. All traces of the Holy War vanish... until an alchemist discovers a strange, glowing crystal and decides to turn it into a weapon. They've woken up the sleeping giant. Amestris is in for a new enemy... and an ally?
1. Chapter 1

**Captain Jap does not own Fullmetal Alchemist or D. Gray-Man.**

 **Peace :)**

* * *

Laboratory 4 wasn't as talked about as the others. It was nestled in a warehouse district in Central City. No one really knew what happened in there. Supposedly, it was going to be shut down with Laboratory 5, but it never happened. An alchemist – state alchemist – managed to convince his higher ups that keeping the lab open would be worthwhile. That he was working on some amazing project that would guarantee the strength of the Amestrian military… and let him keep the title of the Tuning Alchemist. Seraphy Royce was extremely excited. Everyone in Central Command thought that he was going to fail his recertification because of some stupid memory loss. They thought that he changed from his kind, _weak_ demeanor to something much darker. _Be thou for the people_. Well, the people would thank him later when they dominated the surrounding nations. This weapon he found was amazing, to say the least. Encased within a strange material was a figure of a man. The man in the crystal-like substance must have been incredible powerful, for whenever Royce came within five feet of it, he was pushed backwards by an invisible barrier.

"It's right through here, sirs." Royce said, opening the door and stepping aside for his guests. His guests were all higher ranking officers than he. Officers who Royce thought would be interested in power and would support his grand plan. Hakuro, Mustang, Archer, and a few others. He continued to lead them through the dimly lit hallway to a locked metal door. Royce grinned at the officers before fishing a small key from one of the pockets of his uniform, "Wouldn't want anybody stealing my ideas, now would I?" As he opened the door, a green glow highlighted the officers' faces. "What is it, Royce?" Hakuro asked, a greedy glint already entering his eyes. Royce didn't answer, choosing to walk them further into the room.

* * *

A large green crystal _floated_ in the middle of the room. A shadow of a human could (barely) be seen in it. Mustang wanted to believe it was a man, but the shadow of long hair threw him off. In the background, he could hear Major Royce talking about the crystal, about how they could not only use the human inside it, but also the crystal for upgrading weapons. Mustang moved forward, reaching out a gloved hand to touch the strange, floating crystal. Just before he touched it, a wave of energy erupted from it. Dust and pieces of cement rose from the ground as it moved throughout the room, causing the military men to fall over and machinery to spark. "This is the power I spoke of! With this, we can destroy our enemies once and for all," cried Royce, "Are you with me?" He didn't really have to ask, for the look in the officers' eyes was a mix of greed, excitement, and acceptance as they picked themselves up off of the ground. The exception was Mustang, who was still staring at where the crystal had been floating. No one else seemed to be paying attention, and he couldn't fathom what could possibly make his fellow officers ignore _this_.

The crystal had shrunk in size, centering on the man's hand. It slowly took the shake of a glowing sword that appeared to be in the Xingese style. However, there were a few differences that set it apart from that style. The teen (Mustang wouldn't call him a man any longer) also had several characteristics that were reminiscent of the Xingese people. The teen's skin was paler than it should be. His hair was a dark navy blue (rather out of place when compared to the usual black hair and eyes that was common of Xing) and as he woke up, his eyes were cobalt. Those eyes scanned the room identifying the men in matching clothing, who now had turned their attention to him.

* * *

Kanda Yuu was not happy. Well, he was never actually happy (at least not that he would admit). Right now, he was in a rare state of confusion. There were a group of men in matching uniformed (military, most likely) staring at him like the Moyashi stared at his dinner. Speaking of the Moyashi, where was he?

As Kanda scanned the room, it became abundantly clear that he was the only exorcist there. His attention returned to the group of men in front of him. There was one with brown hair that was attempting to speak to him, "-are you?" Kanda replied to the half question with an annoyed "Che."

His grip tightened on Mugen and he took a step towards the group, who was standing in front of the metal door. Almost immediately, three men drew small guns and pointed them at the exorcist. The Japanese teen was aware of another behind him (who had looked to be of Japanese descent as well). "You are to come with us for questioning." Stated the brown-haired man, holding a pair of handcuffs in the air. Before he could register the hiss of a sword being unsheathed, the brown-haired man was flat on his back. The rest of the officers joined him shortly. Kanda stood at the door, turning the handle when he heard a _snap_ and felt heat on his back. Thankfully, his reflexes made him dodge the line of… flame? He turned to look at the man who had caused it. It was the Japanese-looking one, who had his fingers in a snapping position and was staring intensely at the teen. Kanda narrowed his eyes, before dodging another bolt of fire and disappearing out the door.

He never should've gone outside. The buildings were huge and looked like of combination of English and German architecture, but they were abandoned. Kanda had noticed light bulbs in the ceiling as he navigated the halls of the building. Last time he checked (which was never, but Baka Usagi always ranted about new things in the world), they were just starting to be sold commercially. Lightbulbs were definitely too expensive to light an entire building! As if that wasn't enough, there were those weird horseless carriages, cars, if he remembered correctly. There was work being done on them, but it would be years before anyone could use them for day to day use… that's what Baka Usagi said anyways. Cars were supposed to be able to travel faster than horses and maybe as fast as trains. They only needed roads, instead of railroad tracks. Seeing all of this was making Kanda more confused than when he woke up.

As he made his way down the street, Kanda's thoughts fell to his comrades. They had been exterminating a huge horde of akuma (a normal day, really). Moyashi and Baka Usagi had been about two miles to the east with a little over half of it, while he and Lenalee focused on the rest. Miranda ran interference in the middle, keeping everyone in fighting condition with her Innocence. There was a large number of both level ones and level twos, with several level threes hiding. Everything was going as well as it could. When Miranda's energy ran out, Kanda and Lenalee wouldn't be in bad shape. A few scratches and bruises, but nothing terrible. That shouldn't be for a while, thankfully. Static echoed from Kanda's golem, who fluttered right next to his ear. It took a moment, but Baka Usagi's (annoying) voice over, surprisingly serious. "Kanda, have your injuries come back?" Lenalee looked over at him curiously as she exploded another akuma. "No, why?"

"Ours did." Lavi sounded like he was hurting, come to think of it. Lenalee was about to reply through the golem, but she was silenced by a hiss of pain. Bruises were slowly appearing on her legs, accompanied by cuts. Kanda twitched as he was hit by his injuries, as well. Sure, he had a healing factor, but all of the pain coming back at once _hurt_ , damn it. "Miranda's probably out of energy." Lenalee said, rubbing her side where she had gotten hit. However, that theory quickly backfired as their injuries disappeared as well… along with their Innocence. "The hell?" Kanda cursed, looking for Mugen. Lenalee dropped to her feet, stumbling as her Innocence disappeared as well. Slowly, two separated green glows surrounded them. "Kanda! Lenalee!" Lavi's voice came over the golem once again, "Are you guys alright? Our Innocence vanis-" he was cut off abruptly and silence fell over the clearing.

"All of the Akuma are gone."

Lenalee's voice shattered the quiet. Although the two exorcists had defeated almost all of the akuma, there still had been some lurking about. The green glow began to solidify into a gel-like substance. Lenalee spoke again, "This is like on the boat to Japan… Our Innocence isn't gone, it's trying to protect us." She glanced at Kanda, whose eyes widened when he saw her eyes slowly closing. He began to feel the drowsiness that she must have been feeling and everything went dark.

* * *

"Colonel Mustang, sir! What happened?"

"It doesn't matter right now. Get ready to send a search party out. You are looking for a seventeen or eighteen year old man of Xingese descent. He carries a black blade, wears a black and red coat, and has dark blue hair and eyes. He was last seen in the Southern Warehouse District."

"Isn't that near Labora-"

"Recall Fullmetal from the field and get ready to go."

"Yes, sir."

* * *

Kanda slouched against a building, staying out of the light. Every now and then he would see a group of four or five men in those blue uniforms running past. However, his thoughts were on the Japanese man that had thrown fire at him. Those gloves could be Innocence, which makes the man an accommodator. That really wasn't his biggest problem right now. He had to find the other exorcists before someone else does. After all, the damn Moyashi would probably believe what anyone said. Kanda gritted his teeth in frustration before slinking back into the shadows of the alleyway. His first order of business was finding a change of clothes. The exorcist uniform was far too obvious, even if the military men from earlier hadn't clearly seen it.

* * *

"Brother! Colonel Mustang is on the phone!"

"What does Colonel Bastard want now?"

* * *

 **That's a wrap, folks!**

 **Let me know what you think! I don't really have any set schedule for this story, so... yeah.**

 **Oh! Seraphy Royce is a character from one of the FMA video games, so he's actually legit. I played with the description that the FMA wiki gave me, so take that as you will.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Do not own.**

 **Peace.**

* * *

 _Tick Tock._

 _Tick Tock._

 _Tick Tock._

"Are you going to tell me why I'm here, Colonel Bastard?"

 _Tick Tock._

"Oh, Fullmetal! I couldn't see you over the edge of my desk!"

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE COULD BE A SLIVER OF WOOD IN YOUR FINGER AND YOU WOULDN'T EVEN NOTICE IT, YOU MORALLY CORRUPTED COLONEL WITH A GOD COMPLEX! YOU WERE STARING AT ME FOR TEN MINUTES, DAMN IT!"

Mustang smirked. If there was a competition for getting Edward Elric riled up, he would be a record-setting national champion. Unfortunately, the fun would have to come to an end. The colonel glanced at the Elric brothers. Edward was spread out on the couch with Alphonse sitting in his usual shy-looking way, trying to take up as little space as possible. "I called you back from the field," Mustang said, "because there's a city – perhaps even country – wide search for a… escapee. We're calling in a few competent people as we can, and you're one of them. The escapee is a tall Xingese tee- _man_ between the ages of seventeen and twenty. He was originally dressed in a black and silver uniform with an emblem on the left side chest area of the uniform. However, we believe that he would've changed out of the uniform in an attempt to hide. He also carries a sword and is capable of using it. The escapee has long, navy blue hair and pale skin. He was last seen in the southern warehouse district, so I suggest you start your search in the surrounding area. Dismissed." Edward looked at Mustang, mouth slightly open.

"One thing, Colonel. What kind of prison lets its prisoners have weapons?"

Mustang bowed his head, staring at the ground. He wasn't happy about what he was shown in Laboratory 4. He hated the testing that went on in all five of the laboratories. It was inhumane. "One that should've been destroyed before it was put to use." Edward didn't seem to accept this answer, but he didn't push it. "Alright, Al. Let's go catch ourselves a convict." The young state alchemist stretched before exiting the office with an eight-foot suit of armor behind him.

* * *

All the two brothers wanted to do was eat lunch in peace before chasing some escapee all over the city. Was that really too much to ask? Apparently, it two Elrics were seated at a table that was filled with food. Between the siblings was a Xingese man, but not the escapee. The aforementioned man was currently inhaling his meal – no, feast – at a disgusting rate. "Why the hell are you even here, Ling?" Edward asked, his infamous anger seeping into his voice. Ling glances at the blond, swallowing a mouthful of steak. "Well, as always, I'm here for immortality."

"I meant in Central City."

"Ah, well, besides immortality, I met a wonderful young lady who was wandering around the countryside. Said she was looking for her friends. That she had a feeling one of them was in Central. Lan Fan is with her right now. Lenalee – that's her name – is so nice. She was dressed in this funky coat and a skirt that was far too short – not that I'm complaining." That seemed to be the extent that Ling was willing to speak, as he started to shovel food into his mouth again. Edward but his head in his hands and groaned. "By the way, Edward. Thanks for paying for all of this!"

The groan turned into a muffled scream.

* * *

"Excuse me, Lan Fan. Is there access to a telephone here?"

"Yes, there is. Go down the stairs and to the left. It should be on the wall."

"Thank you." The Chinese girl stood from her seat and left the black dressed (ninja?) woman there. "I'll be back in a second!" With one last smile, Lenalee exited out the door. Down a flight of stairs and a left turn… ah! There it is! She reached her hand into her uniform pocket (which she should really change out of) and pulled out a small black diamond. As the exorcist opened her palm, the diamond uncurled its wings and revealed an eye. "Here's hoping my golem calls still work," Lenalee whispered as she connected the golem to the phone. "Call Headquarters. Exorcist Lenalee Lee reporting." There was a lot of static, but she was able to make our voices in the background. "-sor's phone… asn't gone off… -ty year…"

"Hello? Exorcist Lenalee Lee reporting."

"Lenalee! Is that you?" The voice was deeper, but she still knew it.

"Johnny! It's so nice to hear a familiar voice!"

"I can't believe it's you. You, Kanda, Lavi, and Allen all… -isappeare…. –mui…. worried…"

"Johnny? I can't understand you!"

"-lem… of date…. track you… have to…. records…. Sta-"

The line fell dead, now completely static. Lenalee stared at her golem, which was now fluttering tiredly. Out of date? All of the exorcists had the newest golems (except for Allen, he had Timcanpy). The Science Department had just given them the latest models before they went to exterminate that horde of akuma. She unattached her golem and placed it back into her pocket. Lenalee slowly made her way back to the room, which was rented under the name Edward Elric, or someone.

For the first time in a long time, she felt alone. Sure, Ling and Lan Fan took her to the city, but they weren't her family. They weren't the Science Department or the Finders. They weren't Komui, Lavi, Kanda, or Allen. Miranda, Krory, Timothy, General Nine, General Sakuro, General Tiedoll, or even General Cross. Jerry wasn't preparing Allen's mountain of food or Kanda's soba. Kanda and Allen weren't fighting. Lavi wasn't antagonizing Kanda. This hotel… wasn't home.

The only reason she went with Ling and Lan Fan was to get to the city, where she had an overwhelming feeling that at least one of her friends was here. Lenalee suspected it was the Innocence that caused the feeling – almost like a constant tickling in her gut.

When she got back to the room, Lan Fan was standing by the window. "There are search parties," the suspected ninja started, "for a Xingese man with a coat that is described similar to yours and a sword." _Kanda…_ "We do not want you to be arrested, so you need to change your clothing." She indicated a simple black skirt and a grey shirt similar to one that Lenalee has worn for training*. Lenalee nodded, gathering the clothing in her arms and going into the bathroom to change.

Minutes later, she was cradling her uniform in one arm. "Is there a bag or something that I can borrow? I can't throw this away." She asked Lan Fan. The ninja (Lenalee was pretty sure of it by now) nodded and threw a black knapsack at her. The exorcist smiled and gently put her folded uniform in the bag. As long as the strings were adjusted, it wouldn't get in the way of her fighting.

"Let's go meet Master Ling."

* * *

"Also, Edward, you'll find a charge from the Westwind Hotel on your receipts."

"The Westwind is the most expensive hotel in Central! What the hell, Ling! Is Greed merging personalities with you?" Edward crossed his arms, golden eyes shooting daggers at the Xingese prince next to him. However, the prince's eyes were looking at something behind him. "Ah, Lan Fan! I see you brought Lenalee with you. And you got her a change of clothes! How nice!" At this, Edward turned. Lan Fan had her mask on, as usual. Next to her was another Xingese girl with shoulder-length olive green hair and dark purple eyes. _Strange…_ She must have changed from her 'funky' coat, even if she still wore an inappropriate skirt. Edward averted his eyes as a light blush colored his cheeks. "Hello! I'm Lenalee." She smiled at them, holding out a dainty hand. Alphonse jumped on the opportunity. "Hi! I'm Alphonse Elric! This is my big brother, Edward."

 _Go on. Say it. I freaking dare you._

"Well, it's nice to meet both of you." Lenalee said as Alphonse shook her hand. If she found anything weird about young-sounding kid in an eight foot suit of armor, she didn't show it. It was then that Edward happened to glance down at her feet. Red – _blood red_ – bracelets jingled at her ankles, looking perfectly innocent (da dum tss). "Let's go find Ka-this escapee, right?" Edward noticed her slip and raised an eyebrow. In all honesty, he wasn't even surprised that he knew what they were doing.

It was Ling, after all.

* * *

 _Damn it._ Kanda cursed, ducking into an alley as another military patrol passed by. He had… borrowed (Kanda would never admit to something as lowly as _thievery_ ) a dark blue shirt and black jacket. His black uniform pants didn't need to be changed. Mugen was strapped to his waist. He didn't really care if anyone saw it. It's not like they could take it from him.

As soon as the patrol was out of sight, Kanda pulled up his hood and merged with other pedestrians. He kept his head down, so no one could see his bangs. His hair was tied with a torn piece of cloth at the nape of his neck.

It had become abundantly clear that whoever had captured him wanted him back, badly. Using newspapers and radios, he had been able to find out that he was in Central City in some country called Amestris (hell if he knew where that was). Maybe when Baka Usagi resurfaced he would know. First, he had to find the Bookman apprentice (and probably beat the life out of him). Kanda paused as he heard the footsteps of marching soldiers behind him. _Just let them walk by_. And let them walk by he did. Unfortunately, the wind decided to wake up, blowing his hood off his head at the same moment in time that one of the soldiers decided to glance behind him. Everything seemed to freeze in one instant as the soldier shouted at this comrades and Kanda turned to run.

The chase was on.

It wasn't much of a chase. He got blocked in by another group of soldiers and was pinned down by a car within ten minutes.

 _Damn it._

* * *

Lenalee tried to find the source of the gunshots. It wasn't directly on the street that her group was on, thankfully. She looked at those around her, only to find that she was alone (again). Ling and Lan Fan had vanished. Edward and Alphonse were sprinting in the direction that the gunshots were coming from.

 _I have to get to Kanda before they do. Innocence, activate!_

With a supersonic _boom_ , the exorcist disappeared into the sky. Edward wasn't hard to keep track of, mainly due to his red coat and blond hair. It probably helped that Alphonse was wearing an eight foot medieval suit of armor. Just a little, though. Lenalee zoomed past the brothers.

* * *

"Brother, was that a human flying?"

"Humans can't fly, Al."

"Yet that one is flying."

* * *

Her first look at Kanda was him kneeling behind a car with sweat and dirt all over his face. He must have been aware that there were more soldiers moving in behind him, but there wasn't much he could do. He was pinned down by gunfire. Lenalee could _almost_ hear his teeth gritting in frustration. Trying to be quiet, she landed on one of the rooftops behind the shooting line of soldiers. What the two exorcists needed was an opportunity. They needed the gunfire to stop, otherwise both of them could be severely hurt when Lenalee was getting away. That opportunity came in the form of Edward and Alphonse Elric. Lenalee could faintly hear one soldier cry, "Major Elric!" before the young man jumped into the fray. _He's military?_ Thought the female exorcist, staring at the blond. Kanda looked around the corner of the car and drew Mugen, meeting a metal blade that came from Edwards… arm? Lenalee chose that moment to leap from the building, coming in from over the soldiers' heads. Kanda saw her and pushed Edward away as he took several steps back himself and raised his free hand. "What the hell are you doing?" asked Edward, his arm-blade held in a defensive position. Kanda didn't respond, choosing to point Mugen at the young sate alchemist. Lenalee reached out her own hand and grasped Kanda's.

"He's coming with me!" she yelled, answering Edward's question.

"OPEN FIRE!" one of the soldiers cried. By the time the order was heard by everyone, they were shooting at nothing. Lenalee and Kanda were gone.

* * *

They landed at an abandoned farmhouse, just outside of the city limits. It was nowhere near the worst place either of them had ever stayed. "I'll take first watch," said Kanda. He bit his lip for a moment, before speaking again. "We'll find them. We'll find Lavi." Lenalee rewarded him with a small smile. "And we'll find Allen."

"And Moyashi."

* * *

 **SO... You can kind of see who the couples are in this. At least, on the D. Gray-Man side. But only if you squint really hard, because I'm not a romantic. Yullen and... Lavilee? Is that the ship name for those two?**

 **The clothing I was talking about for Lenalee is the Asian style of the tanktop she wears before/during the first Level Four attack. I also have no idea how exactly the golem calls work, so I went with the general way of saying it... No judgement, right?**

 **I wonder who I'm bringing in next time...**

 **ON DRAGON BALL Z.**

 **Just kidding. Thanks to all those who favorited, followed, or reviewed.**

 **Review and tell me what you think :)**

 **Peace**

 **Captain Jap**


	3. Chapter 3

**FUN FACT OF THE DAY: Jap is short for Jasper. Which is my dog's name. Y'all thought I was a guy, didn't you...**

 **Do not own. AN at the bottom.**

 **Peace.**

* * *

"Humans can't fly, Fullmetal."

"But this one did! She was moving faster than a train! I didn't believe Al either, but that's what grabbed the escapee!"

"It's true, Colonel Mustang!"

"Moving on from the… flying girl part of your story. Is there anything else you want to tell me?" Mustang paused, waiting for either of the Elric brothers to say something completely absurd (again.) Neither of them did (thankfully) and the colonel spoke again. "Now then, you're being kept on search duty until these two people are found and taken into custody. We suspect that they are still in the city, or near it. No one was able to see where they went."

"Because they flew out of the-!"

"Colonel Mustang, sir," Hawkeye interrupting Edward as she entered the office, "There's something – someone you need to see. An arrest was made this morning at the National Central Library, First Branch."

"And why do I need to see something?"

"Because the arrested was wearing another one of those jackets."

* * *

Lavi really didn't know how he got into these situations.

All he wanted to do was try to find out more about this country, Amestris, he was in. so he asked a few people on the street (not the ones in the matching blue military uniforms, though). They directed him towards a library that looked pretty new. What they failed to mention was that you needed a special rank or certification to get into the aforementioned library. Of course, Lavi wouldn't realize this until he was locked in handcuffs an hour later.

He didn't really get why he was shooed out of the building (discrimination against red-heads, or something, probably). Usually, people looked at the Black Order uniform and immediately let him in to wherever he wanted to go (that power may have been abused once or twice). The exorcist decided to take a look around inside anyways. He had already scoped out another door that conveniently wasn't guarded. At all. Really, people? The Black Order had a giant stone head that screamed at people for a guard. Better than nothing. Lavi strolled towards the door, moving quickly as to avoid being seen. One easy turn of a handle and he slipped inside.

* * *

Little did the red-headed exorcist know, the secretary at the front counter had called in a few soldiers. First, a strange man tries to come in without military identification and then the back door opens up (triggering an alarm that flashed on her desk). It was her sworn duty to report any suspicious activity, after all.

* * *

That was a lot of books. Lavi whistled as he walked down a row of bookcases. _If I was a history book, where would I be? Oh, yeah. In the dustiest area because no one reads me for fun. Except for the Old Panda._ It wasn't that hard to find. As new as the library building looked, it was already gathering dust in the back. He was thankful that there didn't appear to be anyone else in the building, except for maybe the mean secretary that shooed him away.

Lavi plopped himself down as he pulled out _Amestris: Beginnings, Leaders, and the Military_. "Let's see here," he mumbled to himself, "Bradley… where do I know that name? Military government… surrounded by other countries…. Long history of violence…" It was that moment that Lavi chose to look up from his reading, only to find a man in one of those blue uniforms staring at him. With a gun. Pointed at his head. Oh, dear. "Hiya, buddy. Do you maybe want to point that somewhere else? Preferably away from me? I'd really, _really_ appreciate it." In response, the man narrowed his eyes and moved forward.

"You are under arrest for trespassing on government property and associating with an escaped criminal."

"The trespassing I get, but doing what with what criminal?"

* * *

Mustang looked at the red-headed teen that stood behind a wall of bars, moping. He looked at Hawkeye with an eyebrow raised. "This is him?"

"Yes, sir."

"He's the one that broke into the First Branch?"

"Well, actually I just walked in the back do-"

"Yes, sir."

"Supposedly associating with the man and woman from the past few days?"

"Yes, sir."

"I'm right here, you know. I can hear every single word you're saying, so you might as well actually talk to me." Mustang returned his attention to the teen. "You can call me Lavi," he said with a shit-eating grin. "Why am I even here? I accidentally wandered into a library and you call it trespassing. Then, you say that I'm associating with a criminal. I've hardly talked to anyone since I got here! I'm innocent, I tell you! Innoce-!"

 _bang_

'Lavi' looked at Hawkeye with fear in his eyes. She had her pistol out and pointed at him, smoke wafting in the air around the weapon.

* * *

The chick was a *SSSSSSSSSSSSTRRRRRRIKKKKKKEE* by his standards, but something in his rather intelligent brain warned Lavi against speaking it out loud. That was a bad idea, even for him. Especially when she was holding a gun in her hand. Still, she was really pretty. Maybe even hot, it was hard to tell with the military uniform on. Oh, and the gun in her hand that was still pointed at the exorcist, thank you very much. The black-haired man (Japanese?) seemed to bite back a snort of laughter before speaking again, in a very, _very_ familiar voice. "You were arrested for associating with a criminal and another accomplice because you are in the same uniform as they were seen in. Black and silver with a strange emblem over the heart."

"Well, maybe we all went shopping at the same store that sold a lot of these. Just in different styles. Because I know that Yuu-chan has that overcoat deal and Lenalady has a female version and Allen has an I'm going to stop talking now." Lavi clapped his hands over his big mouth.

"So, you do know the man and woman. And there's another one? Interesting." The Japanese man had a victorious smirk on his face. "Would you happen to know where they are?"

Lavi didn't know exactly where they were, but he could sense them. Probably the Innocence, honestly. All the same, the best lies have a little truth in them. "Nope. I have no idea where they are. Sorry, Mr. Japanese-man." A grin spread across the exorcist's face when he saw the man develop an eye twitch.

"What the hell is a Japanese?"

That grin turned into a comical jaw-drop.

 _Dear Lord. Where am I?_

* * *

"Knowing the Baka Usagi, he probably got himself arrested."

"Kanda, we're actually trying to figure out where he and Allen are. Can you at least be a little bit serious?"

"I was being serious."

Lenalee sighed, pulling her hood tighter around her face. She and Kanda were currently trying to navigate their way back towards the main part of the city. It had been two days since they escaped death by firing squad, so maybe the search had calmed down a little, right? _Think like Lavi. Think like Lavi._ "If I was Lavi and I woke up in a strange place, what would be the first thing I do?" She bit her lip, mind rolling.

"Get himself arrested."/"Try to find out where he was. Like with a newspaper or something!"

They had spoken at the exact same time. Lenalee stared at her male counterpart. "Why are you so set on him being arrested?" Kanda refused to reply, shaking his head. The female exorcist smiled, before continuing with her reasoning. "Okay, so he finds a newspaper. It has the country, what was it? Oh, Amestris, right. He wants to find out exactly where he is. Learn the history and everything he possibly could because he's the Bookman apprentice and is thirsty for knowledge. He goes to a place he knows he can find answers. The library! Kanda, we should ask around about where the library in this town is."

"Che, I still say he was arrested."

"Kanda!"

* * *

 _Whose voice does that remind me of?_ Lavi slammed his head against the wall, frustration mounting. He wasn't frustrated at the fact that he was locked in a cell, all alone. He could probably break out if he wanted to. No, he was frustrated at the fact that Mr. Japanese-man's voice sounded so damn familiar, and he couldn't figure out from where. Oh well, it would come to him. Lenalady and Yuu-chan were definitely in the city, so that was one good thing. Lenalady had probably figured out where he would've gone first off. Yuu-chan would be following her, probably thinking bad things about the red-headed exorcist.

The military men had taken pretty much everything from him. His exorcist jacket had been removed, leaving him in a plain black t-shirt and his gray uniform pants. They even took his favorite orange scarf! It had survived tons of battles! And his headband! Apparently those could act as a weapon. Well, they could. He could strangle someone with the extremely long scarf and flick someone in the eye with the headband. Luckily, Lavi had been able to hide Tettsui*… somewhere that they wouldn't think of checking. He still had an actual weapon that could bust the doors of this cell open if he wanted to.

The exorcist was drawn out of his thoughts by the sound of footsteps down the hallway. Two sets. One completely metal and the other… lopsided. He glanced over as a short blond kid and a big suit of armor stopped in front of his cell. Golden eyes glared at him, as if daring the exorcist to speak his thoughts. Lavi liked dares.

"You're shorter than Moyashi-chan!"

The effect was instant. "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'RE CALLING SHORT, YOU DAMN CRIMINAL? I'LL SHOW YO-"

"Brother, stop!"

"-ORT, YOU GIANT WALKING MATCH. I BET YOU'RE NOT SO TOUGH WITHOUT YOUR FRIENDS! LEN-"

"Brother!"

"HAD FLYING SHOES AND THE OTHER GUY HAD A FREAKING SWORD, BUT YOU HAVE NOTHING!"

"Wait, you know Lenalady?" Lavi perked up. This guy was so much more fun to tease than Allen. All Moyashi-chan would say is "It's Allen," unless it was Kanda calling him by his nickname. The blond stopped his screaming, distrust coloring over the rage in his eyes – _Noah?_ "What's it to you?" _Oh, great comeback, short stack._

"Well, maybe she's my friend. Maybe both of them are. Maybe they're my sworn enemies. Maybe they're my slaves. The world may never know."

 _She's kind of more than a friend. No one needs to know that, though._

* * *

Lenalee stared in awe at the large building, mouth gaping. "It's not as big as Headquarters, but wow." Kanda snorted in amusement next to her. Of course, he wouldn't be in awe. He was Kanda Yuu, after all. Bad-ass exorcist extraordinaire. He had seen bigger and better built things in his life.

This building?

Nothing.

"There's a lot of soldiers around. I wonder what happened…"

 _Baka Usagi got arrested, that's what happened._ Not that Kanda could say that. Lenalee would probably hit him with a clipboard or a book. So violent for someone so nice. The Japanese exorcist moved forward, staring at the ground. He heard Lenalee's footsteps behind him. No one really paid them any mind as the two quietly entered the library. They approached the front desk, Lenalee taking the lead. "Hi," she started, "we're looking for a friend of ours. We think he came here for research, but he never came home." The secretary stared suspiciously at them.

"What does your friend look like?"

"Ah, well he has red hair and is about this tall," Lenalee raised her hand to an estimated height of Lavi. "He was wearing his orange scarf and headband last time I saw him…"

The secretary had been reaching under her desk for something. Baka woman, thinking he wouldn't notice. As she pulled out a small firearm, Kanda unsheathed Mugen and cut the barrel in half. Unfortunately, he couldn't stop the ear-bleeding banshee scream for help that came from her. The male exorcist grabbed Lenalee and moved deeper into the library. The heavy _thuds_ of combat boots came within range, along with the secretary screeching the direction they had gone. "It's a modern building. There's going to have to be another door. Like a fire exit, or something." Lenalee whispered. Kanda nodded. As much as he would like to take on the soldiers, humans (even if they were dumb) were a little different than slow, stupid akuma. He pointed one way and then another, which was quickly translated as "You go that way, I'll go the other. Meet outside." Lenalee nodded, sprinting down the aisle of bookshelves. Kanda moved the opposite direction. He had opted to take on the front door route. Lenalee didn't have the healing factor like he did, although she would be faster.

The exorcist used his dark clothing to blend with the shadows. A group of soldiers passed him by and he began to move again. The front door was in sight, but the harpy was still sitting at her desk (looking rather pleased with herself). One knock on the head with Mugen later, she was out cold, drooling on some very important looking documents.

Kanda made his way outside, not pausing to survey the area. Lenalee would already be waiting for him. One mad dash later, avoiding bullets all the way, he caught sight of her. First visual assessment, she seemed fine. Second visual assessment, she was holding her right shoulder and she had blood on her fingers.

 _Damn it._

"It just grazed me, we're good."

"For now. We're going to the prison."

"Where's the prison at?"

"The one Baka Usagi's being held at is in the middle, underneath the main command building."

"Always the most complicated. How do you know, anyways?"

"Papers on the harpy's desk. Now, move."

* * *

 **That's a wrap.**

 **1.) Thanks to everyone who reviewed, favorited, and followed the story! Love all of you!**

 **2.) The uniforms I chose are the ones I like the most. Meaning the Noah's Ark uniforms.**

 **3.) I'm saying this is after the Level Four invades the Order and I don't know when in FMA. We'll see where my imagination throws it.**

 **So... Lavi's in jail, Lenalee's shot, and Kanda's actually speaking. All we're missing is Allen. He won't come in for at least another chapter. Still planning his entrance.**

 **Thanks once again!**

 **Review, favorite, and follow!**

 **Tell me what you think or ask any questions you might have!**

 **Peace**

 **Captain Jap**


	4. Chapter 4

Do not own, look at the bottom AN after. Thanks! Enjoy!

* * *

 **YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY**

Kanda pulled the bandages tighter one last time before deeming it acceptable and allowing his patient to button up her uniform. He and Lenalee were currently kneeled behind a large dumpster, catching their breath as they prepared to make one final run to rescue their comrade. The game plan… was absolutely terrible, in the Japanese teen's opinion. The two exorcists would find a group of the military men and knock them out. With any hope and a lot of luck, two of the uniforms would be close to the correct size. Lenalee and Kanda would proceed to dress themselves in the uniforms ( _stupid_ ) and somehow manage to sneak/walk into the building where Baka Usagi was being held, navigate to the prison cells, grab Baka Usagi, and then escape with their heads.

It's a great plan, according to Lenalee.

That's how the duo found themselves behind the dumpster about an hour later, donning the blue military uniforms of Privates Gregory Smith and Sarah Lin, who were both hidden further down the alleyway with blankets the exorcists borrowed from a clothesline. It truly wasn't the most flattering on the two fairly attractive teens. Private Smith was a small, chubby man whose uniform was sweaty and smelled of cigars. Private Lin was very, _very_ tall (although she was the same…. width as Lenalee) and seemed as if she really did love the smell of her flowery perfume. The author will leave that imagery here for you to giggle about to your heart's content.

Kanda glared at Lenalee as she put her shoulder-length hair into a military-style (at least she hoped) bun. "Kanda," she started. "You should do the sa-"

"No." Kanda was not a religious man (funny, considering what occupation he held). But for God's sake, he was already trapped in this tiny, suffocating uniform. There was no way that he was going to tie his hair into some kind of… man bun. There was a limit to how far he would go to rescue a comrade, and that was it. No.

Lenalee frowned at him, but knew that she lost the fight. "Let's go, then." She said, exiting the alley with Kanda close behind her. They were about two and a half blocks from where the older exorcist thought the main building was. Unfortunately, being that close to a military base meant that there were a lot of soldiers loitering about. However, it was more the civilians that were giving the two odd looks. Thankfully, Kanda worked as a shield and directed his 'I will eat your soul' glare at them. They made sure not to look that way anymore. By some stroke of luck, the two were able to maneuver through crowds and made it to the front gates. "You would think it would be better guarded." Kanda nodded his head, agreeing with Lenalee's whispered statement.

"Don't question it and keep moving."

 **MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG**

"Wow, we've really made a lot of progress. I would say that we're pretty much best friends."

Edward's eye twitched in time with Mustang's. The Xingese man turned his glare onto the young state alchemist, provoking a silent conversation between the two.

 _Why did I let you convince me to bring him to my office?_

"This couch is super comfy! Can I have my scarf back?"

 _Because he said that he knows where the other two might be._

"Maybe could I have my jacket? Puh-lease! It's getting cold in here! I want to put on all my clothes!"

Mustang turned his attention back to the bouncing ball of energy (were those rabbit ears?). As annoying as the child-stuck-in-a-man's body was, he (and his comrades) were extremely valuable to the Amestrian military. If the colonel could be the one to bring all three – maybe four – in, there was definitely a promotion in his future. So when the Fullmetal Pipsqueak ( _Damn you, Colonel Bastard_!) had broken down his door saying that the idiot knew where his comrades were, Mustang jumped on the chance. The red-head, Lavi, if he remembered correctly, hadn't shut up in the ten minutes he'd been in the office.

"Fullmetal says that you know where your comrades are. I suggest you sit down and talk before I have Lieutenant Hawkeye come in here." As he said this, Lavi grew slightly paler. No doubt he was remembering when he was attempting to proclaim his innocence.

"Ah, location, location, location. They may or may not be on their way out of the city."

"And they wouldn't come for you?"

"Nope, Yuu-chan hates me. When he doesn't want to do something, not even Lenalady can change his mind."

 _He's lying._

 **LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI LOVELY LAVI**

Ah, the pros of purposely lying badly.

Mister Japanese-man (Colonel Mustang, as his desk plaque read) picked up on it. Lavi had shifted his view towards the ceiling, as if trying to avoid eye contact, and bit his lip. Kanda and Lenalee were already here, although Lavi couldn't tell where exactly. It seemed that the Innocence wanted to be helpful, but not too much. After all, we wouldn't want the exorcists to have an easy time doing anything, would we?

Plastering a cheeky grin on his face, Lavi looked at Fullmetal. That's kind of a weird name, but also pretty cool. It probably came from the metal leg that made a soft grinding noise at random times when the teen was moving. Golden eyes stared back at him before flicking to his hands. Ah, so he noticed that the exorcist was twirling Tettsui around his fingers. Observant, seeing as how his superior hadn't. The blond opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when Lavi performed a one eyed wink at him. Fullmetal narrowed his eyes and glanced at a walking, talking suit of armor, but was silenced when Mustang started to speak.

"What does the symbol on your coat mean?"

"A symbol of our Lord, Timcanpy."

"Where are you from?"

"Nunya. It's pretty close to Bidness, maybe you've heard of it."

Suddenly an explosion rocked the building. Mustang's next question was cut off as he and Fullmetal raced for the window. Lavi was right behind them, cursing as he saw the five level one akumas firing sporadically in the courtyard. The exorcist turned on his heel and strode towards the door. As he made his way towards where his Bookman intuition (definitely not the author's) told him where the door was, Lavi could faintly hear a "He's gone!" and three sets of running footsteps.

When he had entered the other office where all the other soldiers worked, no one really made a move to stop him. Lieutenant Hawkeye had her hand reaching towards the holster on her hip, but it seemed that everyone was in some kind of shock. After all, who would dare launch an attack on the main military building in the middle of the main city in the middle of the country? Lavi had decided that he wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth and had continued on.

A few minutes and one almost deadly wrong turn later, he was standing outside the front doors. Craters were everywhere and unfortunately there were more than a few empty blue uniforms. Other soldiers who were (hopefully) unconscious laid splayed out in random locations. They had probably been thrown from the force of an explosion and knocked their heads. Every now and then a round of gunshots could be heard, echoing around the city. It never did much more than creating sparks on the armor of the floating akumas. The same creatures that had now turned their attention to the red-haired exorcist. _Away from the building, away from the building!_ Lavi jumped down the steps and drew most of the akumas' fire away from the probably very expensive to repair building. The Black Order would not be happy to receive that bill.

" _Ozuchi Kozuchi! Man, man, man!"_ The now gigantic hammer demolished two of the akuma, causing them to explode in a cloud of dust. Lavi dodged another bullet, turning to hit two others. However, he was stopped by one exploding into dust and its friend (can akuma have friends?) smashing into the ground with extreme force. And then he heard the voice of a Lenalady. "Lavi!"

"Yuu-chan! Lenalady! You came for me!"

"Shut it, Baka Usagi!"

Apparently the last akuma didn't like being forgotten. It simultaneously fired at the exorcists and at a crowd of curious civilians that had gathered. Kanda's voice cut through the air.

"Move!"

 **LENALEE LEE LENALEE LEE REPETITIVE LENALEE LEE LENAELEE LEE**

The three seemed to vanish as they moved in different directions to avoid the bullet. Lenalee went in the direction of the civilians. _If I'm able to get there in time, I might be able to deflect it…. Or take the hit._ As she neared the group, something she saw in the corner of her eye made her slow. A bolt of fire was streaking towards the bullet as fast as she had been moving and, in front of the civilians, a thick wall of concrete was rising from the ground. The wall had strange blue lightning arcing around it. The bolt of flame connected with the bullet and caused it to explode, sending bits of shrapnel and dust everywhere. Lenalee turned her attention to the last akuma, which was being suspiciously silent and still.

" _~Lord Millennium is in search of you…~"_

She was swinging her legs back and forth, twirling an umbrella around her hand.

 _~"Looking for the heart now, have you heard the news?~"_

Striped stockings complimented the gothic Lolita style dress she wore.

Road Kamelot smiled at the trio.

"Hello, exorcists. Or should I say good morning? Probably good evening, but then that makes me sound like that vampire exorcist. Anyways, Millennie asked me to tell you that. I wanted to see Allen, but he's not here." The Noah twirled one slim, gray hand in the air and a door appeared behind her. "Bye-bye, now! I'll be seeing you all very soon." She leapt from the akuma, jumping into the unseen space beyond the door just as Kanda sliced the akuma down the middle.

"Che." He grunted, sheathing Mugen. Lenalee let out a sigh of relief that she didn't know she was holding. Even if level ones weren't a challenge anymore, it was always a little… sketchier when a Noah appeared with their minions. They should really be thankful that it wasn't a level three or four.

 **EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH EDWOAH**

Mustang was almost completely useless.

That's the conclusion that Edward had long since reached. The idea had formed in his head the first time he had walked into the office and saw Lieutenant Hawkeye holding a pistol to the colonel's head because he didn't want to do paperwork.

Like he said, almost completely useless.

Sure, he was a great alchemist and all, but it also seemed that the Flame was terrible at catching people.

The three 'convicts,' as they were being referred to again, had shared one look and suddenly Lenalee was flying away. Lavi and the girly one were sailing through the air on a… hammer? _What?_ None of this makes sense.

The two males landed on the closest rooftop and bounded across it. By this time, Mustang had taken of and was racing after the trio. And of course, Edward and Alphonse were right behind him looking for a chance to slow down the two that were grounded.

Just as the brothers saw their chance and went for it, the runners somehow managed to take to the air by leaping off the either of the walls that were forming on both sides of them. Similar to what the girly-man did earlier, they reached out their hands and were picked up by a very fast Lenalee. Before they disappeared, an "Are you calling me fat!?" exclamation came from Lavi.

Three teenagers had escaped three skilled alchemists (two that were State Alchemists) and played a part in pretty much destroying the courtyard of Central Command.

 _Damn it,_ Edward cursed silently, _I'm on clean up duty._

 _ **MUSDANG**_ **MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG MUSDANG**

This was very, very strange.

There were several Amestrian military uniforms (nine, Mustang counted in his head) that had been found during cleanup in the courtyard. It was as if the men and women who owned them had simply vanished without a trace. The only unusual thing on the uniforms was a strange, dark silvery powder that had almost been mistaken as concrete dust during the first inspection.

Nine people, gone in the blink of an eye. No one knows where they went and most are assuming the worst.

Then there was the question of what those things were. Similar to how the nine disappeared, those five creatures (if they could be called that) had apparently appeared out of nowhere.

It was times like this that Mustang wished he had been out there to see what had really happened. Because the witnesses the military questioned were absolutely crazy. One older gentleman had said that one of the creatures burst from a woman and shed her body much like a snake shed its skin. Another woman said she saw a soldier disintegrate into ash after being hit with a bullet. That _would_ explain the powder on the uniforms, though, so the Flame Alchemist didn't completely write that one off. But the man sounded crazy. It almost warranted a background check from the colonel, honestly. You know, see if there was a history with drugs.

Just in case.

Mustang ran a gloved hand through his messy hair. This incident had created a new mountain of paperwork for everyone. And at the same time, more specialized and better equipped teams were being put together to search for the trio of teens that had destroyed the creatures with surprising ease. The higher ups really, _really_ wanted that power on their side.

 **YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY YUU ARE SO PERDY**

 _It would be really nice if everyone would shut up, for once._ Kanda's eyebrow twitched as Lavi continued to talk about the most random things. A kid with a metal leg, almost getting shot, and someone who apparently sounded like the Japanese exorcist. It was getting ridiculous.

After fleeing from the military base, the three had returned to the abandoned farmhouse. Lavi had volunteered for the first watch, but neither of the other two were getting any sleep. "I can't believe you called me fat, Lenalee!"

"I didn't! I said that it was heavier than my usual get away load!"

"That's pretty much calling me fat!"

"Baka Usagi, you're fat."

"Yuu-chan! You're so mean to me! And Lenalee! Did you betray me for Yuu-chan?"

Silence enveloped the group (mostly due to Mugen resting peacefully at Lavi's throat). They stared into the small fire that the red-haired accommodator had built. "Guys," Lenalee started, "where do you think Allen is?"

"Ah, Lenalady, you know how Moyashi-chan is. He's probably worked his way into someone's heart and is eating them out of house and home." Lavi grinned at her while Kanda snorted.

"Che, he probably got himself kidnapped. Or killed."

"Kanda! You shouldn't say that!"

 **IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK IDK**

" _~Who is it that has my heart? I will find you soon.~"_

* * *

That's a wrap for this chapter! I'll only be using Japanese for Kanda's insults and any Innocence or weapon names that merit it. The biggest example is Lavi's Innocence in this chapter (Big Hammer, Little Hammer. Grow, grow, grow!)

I'm letting you guys kind of decide how Allen is found. I'm not going to say anything further on this, but pick one of the four and either message me your choice or leave it in a review.

Clown

Crystal

Briggs

Scar

Bad news? I'm working every day this week. Good news? I'll be writing almost every day this week.

Have a fantabulous day. Word actually recognized that as a word. Sweet.

Read and review! Hope you enjoyed!

Captain Jap


	5. Chapter 5

Hello there! This is one of the dreaded author's notes, but not quite as dreaded as another kind. This one is just informing you wonderful readers that this story is being rewritten! The first chapter will be up today, under the title of "Good Morning Exorcists" or something of that like. Just go to my profile and go from there.

The rewritten version is already being posted on ao3 under my name on there (theFrenchMistake16), so I do have two chapters written! As soon as I get chapter four/five of the rewrite written, D. Gray-Metal will be (unfortunately) deleted and the main fic will be Good Morning Exorcists.

See you in the first updated chapter!

Thanks for reading!

-Captain Jap


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